Thinking.............Struggles

I have just been thinking a lot lately and struggling with a few things. I wonder so often why things happen for a reason. I know that we are not to judge, question or wonder what the Lord has planned for us. But I can't help but sometimes think "WHY". And there is just so many things that are unanswered in my life and that have happend the past 5 years, I can't help but question. I sometimes feel and been feeling lately that I help others and want to do what is best and even though I try to do my best and think that I am helping, I feel I am not appreciated. I know that everything happens for a reason and we may struggle and often wonder why we have to struggle to get where we want to be. I look at the challenge we had to go through to get Isaac and the three lost lives we had before Isaac, there honestly isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of those little Angel's that God has called from us. I wonder why he took them so early and what the reasoning was. Then I look at Isaac and Makia and think this is what was suppose to happen and God has his reasonings for how the way things worked out. I look at my hard struggle I had with my pregnancy with Makia and how hard it was and how sick I was with my kidney's. Truly is shows that we do have to work for things we truly want and sometimes it may be a challenge, but the outcome that Curt and I got from the struggles we had with my pregnancies were wonderful. Our kids are a blessing and gift from God that we Cherish every day. I continue to pray for strength is my time of confusing thoughts and worries. I have to trust that the Lord will take care of us and always be there. Never the less I know that we are not to worry and to Trust in the Lord- Proverbs 3:5

I look at this picture of Isaac and just smile! He is so sweet and he knew just what to do in church as the pastor was praying the day of our good friends wedding. He calmly just put his hands together and did what he was suppose to do and sat their quietly. How precious is this?